#Tellafeministthankyou is trending on twitter and within the trend I came across an article about Rihanna and Chris Brown getting back together and how Chris Brown is a hate figure. For all we know she may have thrown the first punch and Chris Brown was “defending” himself. Yet she is the delicate flower and he is the big bad wolf. Gender is not the issue here. NOBODY should hit anyone and if someone hits you, you should be man or woman enough to WALK AWAY. Violence only breed violence. Feminism should not mean you have the right to throw the first punch and be congratulated for it. Do not get me wrong, woman should not put up with violence, but then neither should men. Yet, the assumption is if a man and a woman are fighting, then the man is more “evil”, despite the violence that may be coming from both individuals. Anger and hate should never been acted upon in a negative way i.e. violence, regardless of your gender. These emotions like many others can be channelled into a more positive way, like going to the gym, art, cooking, whatever gets the aggression out of your body without resorting to violence. I have lived with someone with anger issues that threw things and not punches, thankfully. But being empathic I still absorbed all that anger, fuelling my own hate. Yet, I still walked away.
February 13, 2013